I’ve seen enough people succeed and fail to see the patterns, the reasons why some people get better and better, while others spin their wheels for months, years or even decades. So why might you be spinning your wheels?
1. You Lack Structure
If you have no plan for getting better, then you probably won’t. Pushing yourself further requires concentrated effort, it doesn’t happen by accident. Structure means having a goal, and an actionable plan to get there.
The easiest way to develop structure is to define your long-term goal, then break it down into shorter-term goals, and then finally into actionable daily tasks. Knowledge and experience helps, but you can pick that up along the way.
2. You Don’t Prioritise Your Goals
Priorities are tricky, there are lots of things that are important to us and we only have so much time and energy. The things higher up on our priority list will improve while the things lower down on our priority list will stay the same or decay. It’s not my place to tell you how to live your life but you won’t find an exception to this rule; if it matters, make it a priority.
If you think priorities are your issue, you can write down your priorities and how much time you give to them each week. If something isn’t getting the time and energy it deserves, give it more.
3. You Don’t See The Point
This is an interesting point that lots of us overlook. If we don’t see a benefit to doing something, whether it’s usefulness or enjoyment of the task, then we’re unlikely to do it unless we’re made to. This is why lots of people go back to their old habits, often just before they would have started to see the benefit.
If we see that something is useful, we may do it even if we don’t enjoy it. If we see something is enjoyable, we may do it even if it isn’t useful in any other way. If something is useful and enjoyable then everything else is a ton easier, you actually want to do it and you enjoy both the process and the results.
A good way to see if you really want to spend your time pursuing a goal is to work out what the cost of inaction is. Simply ask yourself, what are the consequences if I do nothing? If you’re fine with the consequences then don’t waste your time. If you don’t like the consequences? Get started on your goals.
4. You Aren’t Accountable
I’m happy to say that most clients of mine retain at least a few good habits after they finish working with me, yet I understand that none of them progress quite as fast after that point.
Some might look at being accountable as a bad thing, however it is entirely natural. Why has every society since the dawn of time had Gods or laws? To create consequences for actions, to modify our behaviour.
My clients are accountable to me, so they get better results – You’d be surprised by the size of the difference. Me? I offer a money-back guarantee, so I’m accountable to every client I have. Accountability makes us all better.
Weight loss groups, personal training services and groups of friends can all provide accountability but as many will have experienced when making plans with friends, you’re only as strong as the weakest link.
What about personal accountability?
Personal accountability is nothing more than holding yourself responsible, however it takes willpower as you’re the worker and the manager of the task. Willpower is like a muscle, use it and it will grow stronger.
5. You Don’t Believe In Yourself
It’s called self-efficacy and it matters.
Self-efficacy is basically how good you think you are at a given task. It doesn’t have a thing to do with your worth as a person or any of that new-age psychology stuff. Those who are confident, or even slightly over-confident, in their abilities perform the best, they take up more challenges, and they improve faster. Those who think they’re no good, or likely to fail, will attempt less and have fewer successes. Your abilities aren’t fixed. Believe you can, then prove you can.